Navigating dating and Love in Today's World
Remember the days of Black Planet?
Well, it's a new era now. We've moved from the traditional dating sites like E-harmony and Match to the world of Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid.
But as we swipe left and right, it's crucial to pause and reflect on what we're really seeking in these digital corridors of love.
The Surprising Truths of Online Dating:
Did you know that 81% of people lie about their height, weight, or age in their online dating profiles? Women claim to be lighter, and men add inches to their height.
Profiles with the word “love” are more likely to find it. Men benefit from words like “heart,” “children,” “romantic,” and “relationship.”
Men spend less time reading profiles and more time looking at photos than women.
About 30% of women consult friends about their profile, but only 16% of men do.
The Evolution of Dating:
We've seen a significant shift from arranged marriages and courtship to modern dating and hookup culture. This shift, fueled by apps and focusing on romance and fun rather than character assessment, has led us to uncharted territory. As Justin Garcia from the Kinsey Institute says, we're in a time of major transitions in heterosexual mating, the likes of which have only been seen once before in human history.
The Culture of Competition and Convenience:
In this era, dating often feels like a competition or a game of efficiency. The rise of terms like "Tinderella" and "Tinder King" reflects a culture where quick, often superficial connections are the norm. It's a world where midnight texts are more about physical desire than genuine interest.
Cuffed to Quality: Four Qualities to Develop and Look For
1. Godly Character: In Song of Solomon, the first thing that stands out is character, not physical appearance. Remember, reputation is what people think you are; character is who you really are. If you desire a godly marriage, start living a godly life today.
2. Growing Trust: Trust is built through vulnerability and understanding. In Song of Solomon, we see the importance of accepting and loving each other's insecurities. This is how trust grows.
3. Higher Standards: The Song of Solomon also teaches us about having standards. In a world where casual relationships are common, holding to higher standards sets the foundation for deeper, more meaningful connections.
4. Consistent Encouragement: Encouragement and affirmation are vital. Treating each other with respect and kindness and seeing the beauty in one another is crucial
The Result: Feeling Special and Secure
Feeling Special: Being cherished and valued makes one feel unique and special, as seen in the progression from insecurity to feeling like "a rose of Sharon" in Song of Solomon.
Feeling Secure: Providing protection, support, and spiritual leadership fosters a sense of security and deepens the bond.
As we navigate the complex world of modern dating, let's focus on these timeless qualities.
Let's not cuff ourselves to the fleeting and superficial but to qualities of lasting value and depth.
In doing so, we build relationships that are not only fulfilling but also honoring God and our own hearts.
