5 ways to stay calm when your family faces a crisis

Last Friday, a quiet autumn day took a turn in our household. My son woke up feeling nauseous and just wanted to sleep it off.

In an effort to feed and comfort the family, I grabbed dinner from Panera Bread - hoping some chicken noodle soup would work its healing magic. 

Just as I returned home, I realized we were short an order. Back to Panera, I went. Little did I know while I was out, our home had turned into a scene right out of a drama series. 

I walked into the sound of my daughter’s tears piercing the air, the kind that sinks right into a parent's heart. There was my eldest son on the floor in the dining room. My wife was right there with him, in full-on Mama Bear mode, yelling for me to call 911.

With a calm I can only attribute to God's grace and past trials, I dialed the emergency number. 

My hands may have been steady, but my heart raced as I relayed our situation to the operator.

My boy had fainted, a fall that brought him face-to-face with the door frame, leaving his chin split open. 

As I reflect, I'm reminded that composure in a storm is a hard-earned trait.

It's the tough times, the ones that test and temper your spirit, that prepare you to be the bedrock when the waves crash close.

I'm grateful for the quiet battles and the resilience they've built in me. And I think of General Schwarzkopf's words:

"The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war." 

As we huddled around my son, waiting for the ambulance, our family's love was the only thing keeping us sane.

This ordeal was another episode of us navigating the unpredictable seas of life together, coming out stronger on the other side.

Thankfully, my son is all good now, a few stitches richer, and with a story to tell. He's a warrior, braver than he knows. 

Life has its moments of chaos, but together, we find peace in the storm.

When a family crisis erupts, like a sudden storm, the ability to stay calm is more than just admirable—it's crucial. 

In those moments, with one child injured and the rest of my family reeling, I discovered a profound truth: your strength during a crisis doesn’t come from a singular moment.

It's the result of how you’ve prepared for life's inevitable storms. 

Here are five ways you can build and maintain an oasis of calm for when your family needs it the most:

1. Embrace Challenges Regularly:

Routinely stepping out of your comfort zone prepares you for unexpected hardships.

Programs like 75 Hard, which push your physical and mental boundaries, condition you to handle stress constructively.

By enduring controlled stressors voluntarily, you sharpen your ability to stay composed under pressure.

2. Address and Heal from Past Traumas

Unresolved issues can be a source of unexpected weakness in trying times.

Confronting past traumas with a professional can significantly enhance your emotional resilience.

Therapy offers tools and strategies for managing stress, allowing you to remain anchored for those who depend on you.

3. Cultivate Intentional Quietude

Silence is powerful.

Regularly practicing meditation or prayer can fortify your mind against chaos.

An intentional relationship with God or a higher power can provide peace that surpasses understanding, especially in moments where control seems lost.

4. Develop Emotional Intelligence

Understanding and managing your emotions is critical.

Emotional intelligence allows you to perceive and assess not just your own feelings but those of your family members.

This insight is vital when navigating the emotional labyrinth of a crisis.

5. Practice the Art of Reflection

Reflect on past crises and how you've managed them.

What worked? What didn't? Regular reflection helps you learn from experience and instills confidence.

Keep a journal, discuss with a mentor, or simply take time to think deeply about your actions and reactions.

The ordeal with my son was a vivid reminder of these principles.

As he lay there, my family demanded of me not panic but presence, not fear, but focus. 

In the quiet of my past preparations—those hard things faced, traumas healed, silent prayers, emotional tuning, and reflective learnings—I found the strength to be the calm in the eye of our family’s storm.

Start today so that when a crisis comes knocking, you can stand firm not only as a source of hope for your family but also as a testament to the quiet power of preparedness.

I did an album called On Edge and it was created to help you reflect on your emotions so that you could grow in your emotional intelligence.